An Epiphany

Today i was sitting in church. Listening to the sermon. And truth me told i spaced a little bit. and all of a sudden i was paying full attention. Because the pastor caught my interest with one sentence "God disciplines the people he loves."

Which made me think...and really think. If God disciplines those he loves...he must really love me. Like a lot. And i know everyone always complains and says "my life sucks" or something like that and while i don't think my life sucks. And i'm thankful for everything that comes into my life (whether those things be bad or good) i still have a lot of crap happen.

But maybe what i call crap is God trying to teach me lessons. I mean the sermon Pastor Syens was telling was about a sheep and how the shepherd let it break it's leg so it would stop running away...and once his leg as healed he never left the shepherd again. So really when God throws all this crap at me it's supposed to make me closer to him. And it works.

Some things in life suck. Some suck really bad. But when you think about it whenever all these sucky things come into our lives we're constantly praying to God hoping he'll help us get through it.

So really the point i'm trying to make with this is that life sucks...but God wants us to praise him and help others learn to praise him. I always say everything happens for a reason...and now i know what that reason is

Song of the day: Who Am I-Casting Crowns...it got stuck in my head the moment i thought of this

Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young
1 Timothy 4:12

People Always Leave

yes, i know this is some sappy saying from One Tree Hill. But it's true. lately people are becoming prone to leaving. Does it affect me? Not all that much. But everything that happens affects you in some way or other. Even if you haven't realised it yet.

Pretty much a lot of drama has gone down in my little bubble of a life. People have become upset, or hurt, or angry and have left. And that's where the people always leave come from.

Now, I don't hate those people whom have left. In one situation i'm kind of happy but wish they would have just stayed to clear things up. Everything was left in such a mess and now it looks like nothing could clean it up. In another situation they left without a word. No one knew til they had left. And they were friends...good friends some. And to make it worse their were no explanations, no goodbyes, not anything. So we came to our own conclusions which could have hurt the people involved if they were to have known.

And really it's not the fact that these people are leaving...it's just the way they're leaving. Some are running away others are being kind of shady and some might not even want to be gone.

And the thing is...i don't think any one of them will come back. And i don't think that all of them miss us they way we miss them. Even though it may seem we don't miss them. So i'm going to say it now. Everyone who left...and i mean everyone...i miss you. Even though some crap..or a lot depending...i miss you. And a visit is always nice. Or a phone call. Or an e-mail. All i want to know is that you're ok and you're happy...all of you...every last person

Song of the Day: Gotta Go My Own Way-Troy and Gabriella (High School Musical 2)

Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young

1 Timothy 4:12

Real Life or Fiction?

So lately whenever I've been watching TV there are all of these couples all over the place. Which is obvious because everybody likes a good love story...even all you boys even though you may deny it.

But whenever i see one of those couples that really works it just makes me hurt just a little. Like when you see Nathan and Haley on One Tree Hill...or Seth and Summer on the OC...or maybe even Ross and Rachael on Friends. Does that stuff ever actually happen...or is it just fiction

And not only is it just fiction...will it ever happen to you. Some people find it early in there life....which is awesome for them. Some people will get it late in their lives which is just fine. But what about us people who want it earlier in their life and maybe won't get it.

Yes i know...I'm 15 why am i thinking about stuff like this? I don't know...i guess it just worry. All i want is to be a mom...and if it comes to late for me...i might not get my wish.

And i trust God...he has my life. but God works in mysterious ways. And sometimes great people who should have it so easy to be loved don't get that. Because for some reason or another God doesn't want them to have it. And i always tell myself everything happens for a reason. So I'm just trying to be optimistic. Whatever God gives i'll love. But there's this one movie called Facing the Giants. In the movie this couple has been trying to have a baby for something like 4 years. All this woman wants is a baby. and her husband asks if God doesn't give her this baby...will she still love Him? So the question is...if God doesn't make me a mom will I still love Him? It's easy to answer now....but who knows...maybe that'll change in 10 or 20 years

Song of the day: Maybe by Kelly Clarkson

Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young

1 Timothy 4:12