Emma Woodhouse (from Emma by Jane Austen) is a character who finds herself dreaming up scenarios and situations from time to time. Dreaming of what could happen in the future and what she would do about it. My English professor asked if any one finds themselves doing that sometimes.
No one answered. No one said a single word.
The truth is, I do that all the time. I don't like it sometimes because I find that I get caught up in these scenarios that aren't real and may never be close to being real. But I always catch myself doing it anyways. I guess I'm a dreamer through and through.
I just thought I would let you know, that when she asked that question...
I looked around the room.
I closed my eyes.
I looked up
and I thought of you.
Song of the Moment: The Scientist by Coldplay (You don't know how lovely you are)
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12
Friday, January 25, 2013
Friday, December 14, 2012
Often Forgotten Awesomeness
Do you know what I take for granted so often? Just how AWESOME God is. Sometimes I forget, which of course sounds terrible, but it's true. Every once in a while something will remind me just how awesome He is when I am silly and forget.
Just think about it. You don't have to do anything special to talk to God. You can be sitting in class, laying in bed, watching TV, in the shower and you can call on Him. Nothing fancy. No special ceremonies. Nothing. Just you and God chatting, wherever...everywhere.
Not only can you talk to Him whenever you want, but He has your life in total control. No, it definitely does not always feel like it. I'll admit, sometimes it feels like my life is in complete shambles (don't believe me? Just go further back in this blog. Messy.). I have come through every single little thing better and stronger and more faithful than I was. That is so awesome.
Finally, to summarize this all beyond belief, I didn't have to ask God to do any of this for me. He just does it. Because He loves me that much. Even though sometimes I am kinda rude to him, and sometimes forget about his awesomeness, and sometimes I only call on Him when I think I need Him (even though I couldn't survive without Him), and sometimes I just suck. He is there. No questions ask. I'm never alone because He is always there and that is the most comforting thing on the planet. He sent His son to die for me even though He knew what a mess I would turn out to be.
Awesome. Awesome. Awesome. If you don't believe me, I really think you should try Him on for size, because you know what, whether you like it or not He is with you right now. No seriously, he is sitting right next to you, looking over your shoulder, reading this blog He knew I was going to write before I even started writing it. He is here. He cares. And you don't have to ask politely for Him to help you out (although it would be nice).
Song of the Moment: Awesome God by Rich Mullins (My God is an Awesome God who reigns from heaven and earth with Wisdom, Power and Love. My God is an Awesome God.)
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12
Just think about it. You don't have to do anything special to talk to God. You can be sitting in class, laying in bed, watching TV, in the shower and you can call on Him. Nothing fancy. No special ceremonies. Nothing. Just you and God chatting, wherever...everywhere.
Not only can you talk to Him whenever you want, but He has your life in total control. No, it definitely does not always feel like it. I'll admit, sometimes it feels like my life is in complete shambles (don't believe me? Just go further back in this blog. Messy.). I have come through every single little thing better and stronger and more faithful than I was. That is so awesome.
Finally, to summarize this all beyond belief, I didn't have to ask God to do any of this for me. He just does it. Because He loves me that much. Even though sometimes I am kinda rude to him, and sometimes forget about his awesomeness, and sometimes I only call on Him when I think I need Him (even though I couldn't survive without Him), and sometimes I just suck. He is there. No questions ask. I'm never alone because He is always there and that is the most comforting thing on the planet. He sent His son to die for me even though He knew what a mess I would turn out to be.
Awesome. Awesome. Awesome. If you don't believe me, I really think you should try Him on for size, because you know what, whether you like it or not He is with you right now. No seriously, he is sitting right next to you, looking over your shoulder, reading this blog He knew I was going to write before I even started writing it. He is here. He cares. And you don't have to ask politely for Him to help you out (although it would be nice).
Song of the Moment: Awesome God by Rich Mullins (My God is an Awesome God who reigns from heaven and earth with Wisdom, Power and Love. My God is an Awesome God.)
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12
Monday, November 5, 2012
Night-Time Drives
My favourite time to be driving in the car is at night. It seems more peaceful. I feel like there is more beauty to see looking out the windows. This proved to be true on Friday night.
I was driving with Tony, the youth guy at my church, on our way home from a Jennifer Jade Kerr concert in St. Catharines. Driving on the 403 looking out the window over the lake I could see a city (as I was later told it was probably Toronto). It was lighting up the sky so beautifully. Near the horizon it was a dark purple and the sky above looked like a huge black cloud.
It took my breath away. My description probably sucks and a picture could never have captured the beauty of it. But aren't those moments, those indescribable moments, some of the best? They keep me going.
The beauty of God's creation is unimaginable. It is beyond explanation. How cool is that?
Song of the Moment: There's A Stirring by Jennifer Jade Kerr (off her newest album which I finally purchased on Saturday so obviously I listened to it all the way home)
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12
I was driving with Tony, the youth guy at my church, on our way home from a Jennifer Jade Kerr concert in St. Catharines. Driving on the 403 looking out the window over the lake I could see a city (as I was later told it was probably Toronto). It was lighting up the sky so beautifully. Near the horizon it was a dark purple and the sky above looked like a huge black cloud.
It took my breath away. My description probably sucks and a picture could never have captured the beauty of it. But aren't those moments, those indescribable moments, some of the best? They keep me going.
The beauty of God's creation is unimaginable. It is beyond explanation. How cool is that?
Song of the Moment: There's A Stirring by Jennifer Jade Kerr (off her newest album which I finally purchased on Saturday so obviously I listened to it all the way home)
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12
Sunday, October 21, 2012
That Feeling
Do you know that feeling you get a concert? It's not about how well you sing, it's about how loud you sing. All you want to do is scream the lyrics as much as loud as you can. It's freeing.
I just spent my evening rocking out to Starfield with two of my younger cousins. It was their very first concert. They didn't even know any Starfield songs. They screamed their first screams. They clapped theif first high claps. And they jumped and fist pumped for the very first time. The thing that was most worth it though was the smiles on their faces.
Tonight was awesome. It was freeing. It was beautiful.
Song of the Moment: Burn For You by Starfield (I'll burn, burn like a fire. I'll burn, with love and desire. I'll burn, I'll burn for you.)
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12
I just spent my evening rocking out to Starfield with two of my younger cousins. It was their very first concert. They didn't even know any Starfield songs. They screamed their first screams. They clapped theif first high claps. And they jumped and fist pumped for the very first time. The thing that was most worth it though was the smiles on their faces.
Tonight was awesome. It was freeing. It was beautiful.
Song of the Moment: Burn For You by Starfield (I'll burn, burn like a fire. I'll burn, with love and desire. I'll burn, I'll burn for you.)
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Thank You
It seems that I have become accustomed to having a bi-annual thanksgiving day post. So here I am. Another long weekend come and gone. And I have just got to say that it was fantastic.
For starters I went back to my much loved community centre where I did placement last year. Than I spent the night with my best friend. I saw my dad's side of the family Saturday and my mom's side Sunday.
I had some really great bonding moments with my family this year. Lately I have been feeling so un-crazy (for lack of a better term) that I feel my relationships are becoming much healthier. I've got to say, when you are 100% comfortable with who you are and confident in your future (no matter what God is going to throw at you) you are less jumpy, less distracted, and less moody.
Are you ready for the list? Because here it is.
1. My family. Extended and not. They are awesome. Of course, sometimes they really grate my nerves, but you know what, it keeps things interesting. They have been so supportive and willing to help lately and I feel so loved.
2. My new school. It's pretty awesome here. I keep thanking God that I get to studying my two passions: social work and Him.
3. My roommates. They are a pretty wonderful bunch. For one, they've been very helpful in getting me settled in to school. Also, they make me laugh...and smile...and other stuff.
4. Pie. Pie is a truly wonderful thing. Crunchy and carby on the outside, sweet and fruity on the inside. Genius combo. I really like pie (I ate 6 pieces this weekend).
There are lots of other things I'm thankful for but I won't make you read them all, because that would take a while. You know, last thanksgiving my pastor gave a sermon where he said the following:
"What if tomorrow you only had what you thanked God for today?"
Tonight I would like to encourage you to take some time with God. Sit down, make a list of the things you're thankful for and bring it to God. You would be amazed at what you get out of it.
Song of the Moment: Happy by Jodi King (Happy is when I'm with you)
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in faith, in life, in love, in speech and in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12
For starters I went back to my much loved community centre where I did placement last year. Than I spent the night with my best friend. I saw my dad's side of the family Saturday and my mom's side Sunday.
I had some really great bonding moments with my family this year. Lately I have been feeling so un-crazy (for lack of a better term) that I feel my relationships are becoming much healthier. I've got to say, when you are 100% comfortable with who you are and confident in your future (no matter what God is going to throw at you) you are less jumpy, less distracted, and less moody.
Are you ready for the list? Because here it is.
1. My family. Extended and not. They are awesome. Of course, sometimes they really grate my nerves, but you know what, it keeps things interesting. They have been so supportive and willing to help lately and I feel so loved.
2. My new school. It's pretty awesome here. I keep thanking God that I get to studying my two passions: social work and Him.
3. My roommates. They are a pretty wonderful bunch. For one, they've been very helpful in getting me settled in to school. Also, they make me laugh...and smile...and other stuff.
4. Pie. Pie is a truly wonderful thing. Crunchy and carby on the outside, sweet and fruity on the inside. Genius combo. I really like pie (I ate 6 pieces this weekend).
There are lots of other things I'm thankful for but I won't make you read them all, because that would take a while. You know, last thanksgiving my pastor gave a sermon where he said the following:
"What if tomorrow you only had what you thanked God for today?"
Tonight I would like to encourage you to take some time with God. Sit down, make a list of the things you're thankful for and bring it to God. You would be amazed at what you get out of it.
Song of the Moment: Happy by Jodi King (Happy is when I'm with you)
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in faith, in life, in love, in speech and in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
You Think You're So Funny
You know, sometimes, God is pretty funny. He works in mysterious ways...and has quite the sense of humour (in my opinion).
This story begins on Sunday night. I was getting ready for bed and having a conversation with God. We were talking about my life and the boys gone and coming. It seemed like that conversation was all I needed to keep me moving forward with strength and patience. But He had more in store for me.
On Sunday night I had a dream. When I go back and think about it, it seems quite odd. Funny, really. But I guess dreams always are when you look back at them. So, I am going to write my recollections of Monday morning (which I took the time to write down):
I was the host of a celebrity competition of some kind. Brett Lawrie was one of those celebrities. When not filming, we would often be found together.
He was kind. He was helpful. He would bring me my glasses when we came inside.
One afternoon, I couldn't find my glasses. I realized the last person to have them was Brett, but he had gone home...to Alaska. I rushed to his house and ended up in my own (but in Alaska). I came in in a panic because a) I couldn't find my glasses and b) we were going to be filming soon and we had to make back all the way from Alaska. I went to the drawer my mom keeps random things and found my old glasses. They were no good. Thankfully, Brett found my glasses. I thanked him and he took hold of my hand and held it all the way back. It was precious. Unexpected. I felt those butterflies in my stomach (even though I was dreaming).
The dream went on. The show continued. And Brett was always by my side. Giving me looks and being kind. It was innocent. It was beautiful.
And then I woke up.
So, yes, I realize that all sounds quite absurd for many reasons. But let me tell you what it meant to me:
1. This "relationship" was unexpected and unplanned. It happened naturally. Without games and broken hearts. It just happened. This is what God wants in relationships. This is what I want.
2. God chose Brett Lawrie. I don't know Brett Lawrie. As far as I know the only things we have in common are that we are both Canadian and we wear the same number (Good ol' 13). I recently heard that you can only dream about people you have seen in real life. I've been watching a lot of Jays games lately so, I've seen him. But I think God chose Brett Lawrie because the chances of me marrying (or even meeting) him are slim to none. God knows my mind likes to run away from me sometimes, but with Brett, it won't. He could have chosen any of the guys actually in my life but no, He chose Brett Lawrie. Good one.
So I spent all of Monday pondering this odd dream and what it meant. Honestly, I knew from the moment I woke up that this was God telling me I've got a great story coming up in my life. A story of love, innocence and unexpectedness. I am willing to wait for this story. My patience is renewed and stronger than ever.
My time of no boys comes to an end in exactly 2 weeks. But, in the past 11 months I have realized what life is really about. And it's not about chasing after boys. God will just bring them to me when the time is right. So I'm done. When I started this I imagined the boy of my dreams appearing right on my birthday (because obviously I deserve an award for my great obedience over the past year....not). I'm so ready to wait and let God move the pieces of my life in their own time and place.
The last moment of hilarity of this Monday. All this thinking put me in one of my indescribable moods. So, on the way home I opted to listen to my iPod in the car instead of the radio as per usual. I was stuck in traffic for over an hour. When I finally pulled into my driveway I took my iPod out and Brad Loveday was putting on the last song because he was late for dinner (as he always is). The following was the final song. Only God would keep me stuck in traffic for over an hour just so I can hear one song. One song to wrap up my entire day and thought process. God, You are just hilarious.
Song of the Moment: Your Hands by JJ Heller
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12
This story begins on Sunday night. I was getting ready for bed and having a conversation with God. We were talking about my life and the boys gone and coming. It seemed like that conversation was all I needed to keep me moving forward with strength and patience. But He had more in store for me.
On Sunday night I had a dream. When I go back and think about it, it seems quite odd. Funny, really. But I guess dreams always are when you look back at them. So, I am going to write my recollections of Monday morning (which I took the time to write down):
I was the host of a celebrity competition of some kind. Brett Lawrie was one of those celebrities. When not filming, we would often be found together.
He was kind. He was helpful. He would bring me my glasses when we came inside.
One afternoon, I couldn't find my glasses. I realized the last person to have them was Brett, but he had gone home...to Alaska. I rushed to his house and ended up in my own (but in Alaska). I came in in a panic because a) I couldn't find my glasses and b) we were going to be filming soon and we had to make back all the way from Alaska. I went to the drawer my mom keeps random things and found my old glasses. They were no good. Thankfully, Brett found my glasses. I thanked him and he took hold of my hand and held it all the way back. It was precious. Unexpected. I felt those butterflies in my stomach (even though I was dreaming).
The dream went on. The show continued. And Brett was always by my side. Giving me looks and being kind. It was innocent. It was beautiful.
And then I woke up.
So, yes, I realize that all sounds quite absurd for many reasons. But let me tell you what it meant to me:
1. This "relationship" was unexpected and unplanned. It happened naturally. Without games and broken hearts. It just happened. This is what God wants in relationships. This is what I want.
2. God chose Brett Lawrie. I don't know Brett Lawrie. As far as I know the only things we have in common are that we are both Canadian and we wear the same number (Good ol' 13). I recently heard that you can only dream about people you have seen in real life. I've been watching a lot of Jays games lately so, I've seen him. But I think God chose Brett Lawrie because the chances of me marrying (or even meeting) him are slim to none. God knows my mind likes to run away from me sometimes, but with Brett, it won't. He could have chosen any of the guys actually in my life but no, He chose Brett Lawrie. Good one.
So I spent all of Monday pondering this odd dream and what it meant. Honestly, I knew from the moment I woke up that this was God telling me I've got a great story coming up in my life. A story of love, innocence and unexpectedness. I am willing to wait for this story. My patience is renewed and stronger than ever.
My time of no boys comes to an end in exactly 2 weeks. But, in the past 11 months I have realized what life is really about. And it's not about chasing after boys. God will just bring them to me when the time is right. So I'm done. When I started this I imagined the boy of my dreams appearing right on my birthday (because obviously I deserve an award for my great obedience over the past year....not). I'm so ready to wait and let God move the pieces of my life in their own time and place.
The last moment of hilarity of this Monday. All this thinking put me in one of my indescribable moods. So, on the way home I opted to listen to my iPod in the car instead of the radio as per usual. I was stuck in traffic for over an hour. When I finally pulled into my driveway I took my iPod out and Brad Loveday was putting on the last song because he was late for dinner (as he always is). The following was the final song. Only God would keep me stuck in traffic for over an hour just so I can hear one song. One song to wrap up my entire day and thought process. God, You are just hilarious.
Song of the Moment: Your Hands by JJ Heller
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12
Thursday, February 2, 2012
This Is Your Life
Recently, I've been reading a lot of nonfiction about purity, love, dating and not dating. I've been doing lots of learning and lots thinking. But, so far, this is the conclusion I have come to:
While I know that getting married and having a family is something I want in my life, being single is good too. For now. Singleness is definitely a blessing in disguise (to most people).
Just think about, when you're single, God can use you for a different variety of things. You can go anywhere, do anything, without having to plan someone else into your life. I think of my best friend who has already been in Mexico for 5 months and is staying another 3. Would she have made that decision if she was in a serious relationship? Maybe. But maybe not. I think of a musician pursuing his love of music and travels a lot. Do you think he would go on all those tours and spend weeks at a time writing somewhere that wasn't home if he wasn't single? Maybe. But maybe not.
And yes, I can think of people who are missionaries in other countries and travel for music as husbands and wives with children. My point is, when we are young and single, we pursue educations and careers and God's purpose for our lives. Some are meant to get married young and others are not. So it's time to quite complaining about being one of the others.
Be who you are. Do what God wants you to do. Make a life for yourself before you make a life with someone else. "If you really love each other you can make a life of your own and a life to share." (Painted Dressed by Patricia Hickman)
In my blog Thinking Right Much Of Thee I added in the lyrics of I Will Come by Greg Sczebel. A few days after that post I noticed the line "And I'll mean it when I say you're my one and only." How romantic is that? I'm not saying you should stop dating. That's totally your own personal decision. I'm telling you that giving your heart away to lots of boys (or girls) leaves less and less for your future spouse.
And I would say, it's not just dating the boys (or girls) it's liking the boys (or girls) too. Sometimes, we put so much of ourselves into a silly little crush, we still lose a piece of our heart.
So. This is your life, are you who you want to be? Are you who God wants you to be? Because if you're not, you've got some work to do my friend. I'll pray for you.
Song of the Moment: This Is Your Life by Switchfoot (Awesome. Awesome. Awesome. Song.)
Don't let others look down on you because you are young but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12
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